Cat Therapy

I'm not going to promise this will be the happiest or even the shortest post, but my mom suggested I write as a therapeutic method tonight.

When people lost pets or their pets died, I never really thought about how sad it really would be. Yeah of course it's sad to lose a pet, but it's not that bad; it's not like a human died, right? Well, I learned this weekend that I don't even want to know what it's like to lose someone close to me because I'm still trying to handle losing our cat.

I've never been old enough to realize how much it hurts to have a pet run away or die... so these are new feelings for me.

We've had Oliver almost 12 years now. He's always been SUCH an outdoor cat and even went missing the first couple of weeks we had him because he had gone wandering off down the street.

Ever since my family moved to Suncrest in 2006, I always worried about the cats being outside with the wild animals roaming around. But, Oliver adjusted so easily (Skeeter not so much lol).

Oliver has been spending most of his nice days outside hunting, roaming, or just laying on the front porch chair enjoying the weather. He definitely doesn't like being cooped up in the house.

After my sister-in-law's baby shower on Saturday (pics to come), I asked my mom where Oliver was since I hadn't seen him all day. She had this look on her face and I knew something was wrong. She said he had been missing since Wednesday. Tears immediately filled my eyes.

After everyone left, I just sat out on the front porch chair where Oliver usually was on a beautiful Saturday afternoon and cried. I knew he wasn't coming back. My mom found me and sat and cried with me; we were definitely the most attached to our kitty.

Last Wednesday, my mom was routinely shutting down the house and getting the cats into the laundry room for the night. She went to the front door like every night to let Oliver in. He was sitting there ready to come in and for some reason, just took off. My mom wasn't too worried about it since he's spent a few nights out by himself and ends up right by the door in the morning ready to come in for some food and water.

The next morning.... no Oliver. Still trying to stay optimistic, my mom felt it would be unnecessary to inform her already high-strung, worry-filled daughter that the cat still hadn't returned.

Oliver not only had the funniest personality for a cat, but he had some attitude and mostly took it out on my step-dad Steve lol.

* Oliver used to lay across his closed bedroom door and Steve would trip over him in the mornings.
* Oliver laid on the top step of the stairs and Steve would roll on him and slip down the stairs
* Oliver even puked in Steve's shoes lol

I think Steve partially brought this on himself for yelling and chasing him out of every room he was in lol.

Oliver also didn't like being put away during a dinner with guests; so what should a cat do that doesn't appreciate being put away? Wipe your poopy butt all over the laundry room cabinets lol.

And some days, Oliver just felt like pooping RIGHT NEXT to the cat litter. Literally, right next to it... and he would just watch you clean it up lol.

Oliver also had the sweetest side though. My mom and I will miss our moments with him:
* Turning on the bathroom sink for him while we got ready because water out of a cat bowl just wasn't the same :)
* How he moped around the house after getting his Lion Cut at the groomers
* Laying across our books and magazines while trying to read.
* Walking across or bumping his head on our laptops while trying to work.
* And the biggest thing I will miss, was him cuddling with me anytime I sat down anywhere. He would lay across my lap with arms stretched as if claiming his place. Or he would tuck his head and nuzzle into you; all while making the sweetest little noises, grunts, and purrs letting you know he was so content.

I've never known a cat with so much personality in 10 pounds of pure fur. Not to mention, he was a gorgeous cat. Firey long ginger hair, gorgeous green eyes, and the softest little paws he let me rub all the time.

Our Suncrest neighbors have posted for 25 missing cats as of last weekend. One neighbor even found her cat torn apart and missing body parts..... which wasn't settling for me in any way.

I'm not sure what would be worse; having your cat lost and not knowing if he's alone, cold, and hungry, or knowing he's dead. If we knew he were dead, we could mourn and start moving on, but not knowing if he'll be at the front door one morning or night ready to come in, makes it really tough to move on and accept that he's not coming home.

I just hope he stuck by homes and has made it into someone's home, rather than heading towards the open mountains and hiding under trees, fighting off the wild animals every day.

I'm constantly checking TabbyTracker.com and the KSL ad we posted in hopes someone comes across our fluffy little man. I definitely think he stands out compared to the typical tabby cats missing; so I hope that ups his chances of being seen.

Thankfully we have two more pets roaming the house and they are just the best of buds. Skeeter and Max are so cute together and hang out all day everyday.

"IT IS BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST THAN NEVER TO HAVE LOVED AT ALL"

I honestly believe in this when it comes to pets. Is it really better to buy a pet, have them for 10-20 years, knowing they'll die WAY before you will, or not buying one at all? I believe having one is so much better than never having one. Pets bring so much joy to our lives and I couldn't imagine our family without the pets we have or have had.

I want to thank my mom for being my rock every day. She's been by my side with positive things of Oliver to remind me of, and amazing quotes and texts to keep my head up. She's also great at reminding me that it is okay to cry when I need to. Mom's words, "The pain is so deep but the memories last forever and we are better for having him in our lives."

She also wanted me to remember what Dr. Seuss once said, "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened." That's a tough one to grasp sometimes, because those happy memories can still make me cry.

Well.... I think that's enough emotional blabbering for one night. Just needed to get some sadness off my chest. 

Thanks to whomever just sat and read through all of that... you're a trooper and a dear friend for feeling sympathetic enough to read about how I'm feeling right now. Thank you. 

I love you so so much Olly and I hope and pray you're safe.